Married Sex - The Rules to a Happy Relationship

I have been happily married 9 years now. In observing other couples and relying on my own experiences I have come to realize that a huge proportion of the arguing is due to sex. Why is there so much fighting and bickering over something so simple? 9 out of 10 times it’s because he wants it more than she doesn’t. He wont stop bugging you for sex and she won’t stop turning him down. While you may feel he’s being pushy with sex you need to look at things from his perspective. Sex between you two is one of the largest symbols of your love for one another. So while you may see it as being pushy he sees it as fighting for something he loves.

     Now people don’t usually like it when you break a relationship down to the raw animalistic nature of things, but I’m going to do so anyway. We are, after all, another animal on this great planet. As a male, there is a very strong natural desire and instinct to stick our hard throbbing cock into a warm wet pussy and shoot a massive hot load into it. A lot of guys will get hard just reading that sentence. I believe it is natures form of birth control for a female to instinctively resist. Just think of all the male animals that have to do a mating call or dance in order to plant their seed. People are no different in this aspect, but what makes us special is that we have evolved to love one another. Sex for us in not merely to procreate but also for pleasure and as a way to express our love for one another. While we have developed these new traits to sex, that natural instinct still exists. That’s why the majority of the time the male is the one who initiates sex. Now… some women say “he tries to initiate sex so often I don’t get a chance, or, I don’t have to”. Well, that’s your fault. You have to head him off at the pass.

     Never should you go to your spouse to simply get off. In doing so it loses its meaning. You’re using the other as a tool and they will sense it and feel it. Eventually your love making will lose it’s love and closeness. You should, however, go to your spouse to get them off. This will make them feel special as opposed to used. It shows how much you care about the others feelings and that you’d like to give them pleasure. A need for closeness and just simply sharing intimacy with your spouse should be the main factor driving the sex initiating process but doing it to simply give each other pleasure or to have fun is great too. Below is a set of simple rules that I feel are necessary to a have fun and happy sex life with your spouse.

December 10, 2009 | bpthings

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Initiating Sex - For Her

So you want to know how to initiate sex huh? Well it may not be too surprising but this is somewhat easier for females than males. Naturally, we’re a little more eager to act on your cues of lustful want. You’re reading this because either you don’t know how or you just plain forgot (yes, I said forgot) how to initiate sex. There could be several reasons for this:

1. Taboo. Society has long stigmatized the act of women initiating sex. For “proper society” the mating dance is an act performed by the male. For a woman to act on her urges and impulsively pursue sex is what, traditionally, makes her a slut or a whore. This taboo is still largely ingrained in the mentality of society. It exists in many of us even subconsciously. Come on folks. Lets wake up and smell the 21st century. Also anything taboo can make things that much more exciting. Men are looking forward to and fantasizing about women hunting us down to fulfill their sexual urges.

2. You don’t have to. You’ve probably let the man in your life take on the responsibility of this job. It does come second nature to us and we do it so much why do you even need to bother. We’ll let you know when we want it and all you have to do is decide weather or not to comply. Well, this isn’t a “it’s his job to take out the trash” sort of thing. If you’re horny, act on it. Don’t save it for the next time we try to initiate sex.

3. Afraid of rejection. You’re afraid of the idea of being turned down and don’t want to take the blow to the ego. Because Men are generally “ready to go” more often that women, I think this is unsubstantiated fear. You won’t get rejected half as much as we do.

4. Not in the mood. You probably have a low libido or are not attracted to the man you’re with. For the low libido part you’re just lazy and greedy. Ok OK, before you start yelling at me let’s break this down. I’ll present you with two scenarios:

October 23, 2009 | bpthings

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